This post is solely to the attention of the parents. In most of the cases all around the world, Parents provide the best to their kids, with all the options available for them. Yet the greatest blunder that a parent can give to their children is to make the child feel guilty ,directly or indirectly, for the sacrifices that they have done. Its a usual scenario in the real world and we see it everyday ,atleast in India, where a parent say “I brought you up in a way that i was not. My parents did not have the opportunity to provide me, but i sacrificed my likes and dislikes so that you could enjoy this”. And thats it! Job well done in plantingthe seed of existentialguilt in the child !!!
Parents please understand, No child will ever like to return back and say ‘I am so thankful for you have burned yourself for me’. Atleast no kind hearted child would tell so. Instead the child would feel, ‘Oh no, My parents have suffered for me and i have to repay them by being obedient’. So the emotional business is started! Any business dealing with emotion is going to end in tragedy! No compromise in that! By being obedient, the child stamps his own creativity blooming up and filters that which comes up within him, and nurtures only those that would aid their parents wish! And the child is already in guilt and no child would bloom in guilt! Either the child becomes rebellious or the child supresses all his emotions and turns violent within. His violence would be an underground world and would start living with a mask in the society.
Parents, just think of giving a statement this way, “My child, you know, i am in so much of love with you that your happiness was mine!”, this is just another way of telling the way you brought up your child, if you ever want to tell.. Personally idont even feel, theres a necessity to let the child know how and what you did for the child. The child watched you while growing and you telling or boasting about your style of parenting is no help for them! Just for parents who cant stop telling their style of parenting to the kids, please do care for what seed you plant in them. If you had planted the existential guilt in your child, its harder for the child to live at all. No parent who knows this would do it, its just out of sheer ignorance that many parents plant the guilt. I take this platform to bring an awareness so that you and your child are released from the emotional business. If you even expect gratitude from your kids, they would be so, if you give them the gift of liberation!! Happy Parenting!!
